Social Anxiety | Do You Have Telephonophobia?
Do you have Social anxiety? Do you have telephonophobia? Telephonophobia is the fear of telephones. I’m not talking about that actual telephone itself, I am referring to making and receiving phone calls.
Social anxiety is a fear of being judged by others, as well as fearing social situations. Those suffering social anxiety may also have telephonophobia which is the fear of telephones.
Do You Have Telephonophobia?
You may have telephonophobia if:
- your stomach goes into a knot when the phone rings or you need to place a call
- your hands start shaking and you feel as though you are going to have a panic attack when the phone rings or when you need to use the phone
- you avoid the telephone at work
- you avoid making any telephone calls, asking others to call for you
If you experience some or all of the situations above, you may have telephonophobia. This is just one more reason why those suffering from social anxiety see their world around them get smaller.
Overcoming Telephonophobia
You can overcome your fear of the telephone with some simple steps. These may not be simple steps to perform, but simple in theory.
- Start by placing phone calls to automated businesses, like a movie theater to check show times for instance. Call every day or several times a day until it almost becomes automatic.
- Next call a business and ask for something very simple like their hours. Ask a simple question that doesn’t take very long to answer, yet you are talking to a real person. Call several different places every day until you get more comfortable.
- Call a business and ask something more complex that would take more time to answer, thus allowing you to have more telephone exposure time. Perhaps ask if they have a certain kind of lamp or other product and if not where they suggest you look.
Be courteous, be direct, and with enough practice, you will begin your journey to overcoming telephonophobia.
Social Anxiety is crippling, but having a fear of the telephone is the worst. Don’t watch your world get smaller, pick up the phone today!
I know I absolutely HATE using the telephone. I much prefer face-to-face meetings.
I think people grow to dislike telephones just because businesses have taken to the nefarious act of using telemarketing to try to get people to buy stuff they don’t need.
Secondly, another reason is that bill collectors, when they call, get very rude and unkind when they keep calling. They might be doing their job, but when you have a nonviolent personality and approach to life, being screamed at by a debtor (even if the debt WAS of your own making) only makes a person more wary when the phone rings.
I hate using the telephone, and I can tell you right now that it has nothing to do with the reasons Kat put forth. Yes, telemarketers are annoying, but that’s not going to make me nervous about answering the phone! It’s not that hard to hang up on them. I’ve also never been in debt so I’ve never spoken to a debt collector.
It’s more of an anxiety about talking to people over the phone (just as the article said), it’s not just a dislike of using the phone as she stated. Big difference. My boyfriend suffers from this as well, and if we want to call a restaurant to place a pick up order we usually argue over who is going to call. We both hate doing it so much that usually it just results in us getting some fast food, staying in, or ordering a pizza online.
Even with caller ID on my phone I still won’t answer it sometimes, even when I know who it is! Social anxiety is very irritating and it’s frustrating when you can’t even make what should be a simple phone call.
That’s me.. welcome to my life. My husband does all my phone calls and all incoming calls will have to leave messages cause I won’t answer the phone. It’s killing me.. I own a business and NEED to be on the phone but I can’t.
Absolute Horror. And nobody understands or believes it.
I can use the telephone, but I don’t because I know that once the call is over, depending on the severity of the call, I will spend hours or days lamenting over the exposure I’ve suffered, whether I make mistakes or say stupid things or not. It’s all about rejection. I assume that one person’s rejection is universal condemnation, and that is the irrational idea I can’t shake anymore than a religious person can deny their god. If I hear again someone asking me to speak up or I can’t think of what to say, or I reveal too much to a family member, or act in the wrong way, then it’s just one more nail in the coffin that is my isolation from people’s acceptance. If I just don’t do anything to bother them, maybe, someday, someone will like me, but at least in the meantime they’ll leave me alone.
Yes, it is crippling. Sometimes just hearing a phone ring can cause anxiety to skyrocket.
Yup, this is me to a T. It’s so odd because when I was younger i.e. high school and college I talked on the phone for hours. Now I can’t even convince myself to call friends. It’s amazing that I call my family! If ABSOLUTELY necessary, as in no way to avoid it, I can make the phone calls, and I can handle doing them at work, but I hate it. I think my telephonophobia is getting a little better as my depression (which I’ve suffered with since college) starts to improve, which is good.
Anyway… best luck to everyone with this phobia, it sucks, and I’m with you.
[…] someone suffering from social anxiety more often than not also has telephonophobia as I mentioned here. Telephonophobia is a fear of the […]
I don’t have a problem calling businesses or making appointments. Calls involving strangers and the exchange of money in the future is no problem. However, I’m terrified about calling a friend to hang out or something. I won’t even call my best friend…I may want to hang out really bad, but instead of calling I’ll sit and wait for the call that will never come. I hate this cowardice.
Yeah. I don’t have troubles answering the phone for family. But when its people I don’t know then I’m totally not answering it. At work, I sometimes have to call doctors offices and ask for fax numbers and confirm patients names. I put it off for as long as I possibly can. I make every effort to find the fax number online so I don’t have to call the offices. And when I have to, I’m stumbling over my words and in a huge rush to hurry up and end it.
I’m amazed that other people have the same problem as me. People around me completely do not understand and think I’m being silly, which I spose I am, but I can’t help it. When I do have to use the phone, especially to strangers, I get out of breath very quickly and then feel like I can’t breathe, having to take huge gulps in between talking to the other person, and sometimes trip over my words and stutter, and my throat goes dry and croaky and I can’t control my voice very well. And then when the call is finished, like Milliner said, I will spend hours, sometimes days, thinking back to the conversation and going over it with a fine tooth comb, picking out all the things I did wrong and thinking that the other person must have thought I was an idiot. It’s crippling, because I need to apply for a new job soon as my contract’s coming to an end and basically all the suitable ones require me to use the phone! Even in my workplace now, I have a phone on my desk, and when it does ring I pretend not to notice or go off and do something else. I’d hate to answer and have everyone listening to me make a fool of myself. I take beta blockers which help with things like driving and blushing, but doesn’t help with this, I think it’s a self esteem thing, as in anxiety over what other people think of you. It’s good to know other people are in the same boat but a lot of us seem to be using the same tactic - avoidance!
Depending on what state of mind I’m in, talking on the phone can be fun or complete hell. I sweat, my hands shake, my voice shakes from the adrenaline rush of the flight/fight response, I can’t think straight, and on really bad days I’ll have trouble seeing, as if I am about to pass out. I never thought, though, that it would be a common phobia. I always thought it was a silly insecurity that I just needed to get over.
In some of the above comments I noticed how telemarketers and bill collectors were mentioned as a possible cause or aggravator of the phobia. I’ve been both and even then I hated phones. I think my experience as a bill collector (which didn’t last long) was the icing on the cake for my fear of phone conversations. Just the thought, sometimes, will get me worked up and agitated. Mostly I only answer phone calls from my husband or family members. I try to answer for friends but often end up emailing, texting, or IMing them back. It makes me feel bad because I love my friends but the fear blanks my mind out and usually it ends up with them talking and me having nothing to say, I fear that my behavior may come off as my not caring what they say when in fact I hang off their every word.
I have noticed that if I have a long face-to-face conersation with someone before talking on the phone to someone else I feel more relaxed and rarely anxious about the phone conversation.
So… best of luck to everyone who feels the same. I will be taking it slow and do my best to stop avoiding/ignoring the issue, it just gets worse when I do.
I’m so glad I found this!
The whole things has become crippling to me. I have several people who repsonded to ads I placed and I can’t find the courage to call them back!!! I get so mad at myself and my husband doesn’t get it, so no help there. Just thinking about making the calls, constricts my breathing and makes me panic.
I’m trying to do it all via e-mail, but that’s not curing anything….