Social Anxiety is an extreme fear in social situations.  A person suffering from social anxiety finds it almost impossible to meet new people.  So how then is a person with social anxiety going to make friends?

You make new friends the same way you perform other steps in curing your social anxiety; very slowly.  You take baby steps until you feel comfortable to take bigger steps.

How To Make Friends

Consider joining a social networking site like Yuwie.  I prefer Yuwie over MySpace because it is a cleaner site.  They are family friendly and they take that very seriously.

You can join Yuwie and search for members in your area.  You can email back and forth to learn more about them so it is easier to meet them and you will have more to talk about.

I also encourage people to join social networking sites to feel more confident talking with people.  Remember the more you practice anything, the better you become.  That is why avoiding social situations is the worst thing you can do because you will perfect avoidance!

Once you have broken the ice and got to know someone in your area, consider meeting them for coffee.  If you have a friend or relative to go with you that would be ideal as it can be risky meeting someone you met online.

If not, just make sure it is in a public place preferably during the daylight hours just to be safer.  Just use common sense and put some rules in place right at the start and you could be well on your way to making a ton of new friends.

If you would like to join Yuwie and be my friend, you can learn more and sign up HERE.

Don’t believe everything you hear.  You’ve heard this statement many times before, right?  Then why do you?  Why do you believe everything you hear?  Do you think you are worthless? If so, then you obviously believe everything you hear.

What do you do with your negative thoughts, do you believe them?  If you think you are worthless, then yes you do believe them, because you are not worthless.

What did your thoughts tell you today?  That you were a bad parent?  Did they say you can’t do anything right?  You need to not listen to your negative thoughts.  You need to replace your negative thoughts with positive ones.

If you can’t think of anything positive to say, then just start singing; very loudly if you have to.  Just get rid of the negative thoughts.  They are no good, they serve no purpose, and they will just keep beating you down if you listen to them.  Negative thoughts will reinforce your feelings of worthlessness.

Don’t let anyone else say anything negative to you, either.  If someone tries to put you down for any reason, just simply state you will not tolerate that kind of talk.  If it continues, seriously consider getting away from that person.  People will only say things to you if you allow them to do so.  Others will try to make you feel worthless because that is how they are feeling.

You are worthy of respect.  You are not a worthless person and you don’t have to listen to anyone being negative.  It upsets me that for one, people are like that and two; people allow others to talk to them like that.

So, again, are you worthless?  No, you are not.  Do you allow others to treat you as such?  Maybe, but only you can put an end to such treatment.  You are not worthless.

Why does it have to be so difficult? Just chat with me. Don’t want to chat? How about let’s babble, converse, jabber, gossip, or gab. Chatting, conversations, and small talk don’t have to be that difficult.

What are we afraid of? Are we afraid of being ridiculed? By who? If the person we are talking to feels the need to ridicule, then they are the ones who look foolish. Don’t allow the other person to make you feel any negativity. Remember the saying only dogs get angry? Well, the same thing applies here. You feel what you allow yourself to feel.

However, if there’s a need for some tips on chatting or conversing with people, there are a few things you can do to alleviate some anxiety.

When asking questions, they say it is best to use open ended questions. In other words, ask questions that cannot be answered with one word like yes or no. Instead of asking someone if they like school ask what they are studying in school or what do they like about their school.

Make sure you listen to what the other person is saying. It is easy to get caught up in our own thoughts when we are nervous or anxious.

Listen to other people’s conversations and learn from them. What questions are they asking? Are they open ended questions? How is each responding to the other? Learn from those you feel are good conversationalists.

Join a social network site like Yuwie. Social networking sites are a great place to learn how to converse with other people. Practice makes perfect! So, what are you waiting for? See you at Yuwie!