Suffering From Shyness?
Are You Suffering From The Daily Anxiety Of Being Shy?
Are you suffering from shyness? Or could it be something more? Some people who think they are just shy are really suffering from social anxiety. Social Anxiety is often misdiagnosed as simple shyness.
Are You Just Shy?
Ask yourself the following questions:
- Do you worry for days, weeks, months about an event you have to attend?
- Do you immediately start coming up with excuses not to attend an event?
- Do you have an extreme fear of being judged by others?
- Do you have extreme fear of talking to strangers?
- Do you find it almost impossible to use the phone?
- Do you panic when someone knocks on your door?
- Do you avoid going to the store?
- Do you find it extremely hard to carry on any form of conversation online?
- Are you extremely afraid of looking, doing, or saying something “stupid” in social situations?
If you answered YES to any of these, you may be suffering from SOCIAL ANXIETY.
You will learn how to overcome your suffering from shyness, as well as overcoming your suffering from social anxiety.
No longer will you have to sit on the sidelines… missing out on life, hoping and praying to be different.
You will also find out why you must not wait and hope for things to change. You must take action now. Not taking action will result in increased fear and possibly bring on additional problems such as Panic Attacks, Depression, Agoraphobia, and more.
This site will offer proven methods I have used that will take you step by step on a journey to overcome your daily pain and struggles of missing out on life. Resources and methods such as:
- changing your thought process
- setting goals
- defining your beliefs and expectations
- assessing your fears
and much more…
How do I know this?
My name is Pam, and I have Social Anxiety. I can remember instances of panic when I was 4 years old. Obviously I didn’t know then what was wrong, and I didn’t find out until much, much later.
I have been to countless therapists, doctors, psychologists… I have read many books and I have spent hours every day doing research online.
My situation was so bad, I couldn’t even walk out to the mailbox and get my own mail. The worst thing is, I have missed out on numerous events with my children.
I know where you are at; I know how you feel; I know the pain, guilt, and embarrassment that comes with social anxiety.
I also know, if you choose to ignore this disorder, it will continue to get worse. My symptoms escalated to depression, panic attacks and agoraphobia. Until I chose to do something, and you can too!
Hi,
I’ve been told that hypnotherapy works and should give it a try, as I have SA. Do you know if this is correct. Would love to hear.
Thank you
TH.
Yes, TH, I have heard that hypnotherapy works for most people if used regularly. Good Luck!
hi, i also suffer from anxiety, well i hav obsessive compulsive disorder, and i get veally anxious if i do or say somethine i,e if i dont want something to happen, and its getting to the point where i feel isolater and trapped in my own mind, i dont know how to deal with it as much as id like to, ive learnt that if you just ignore the problems and try to blank them out of your mind then you come around and feel much better and forget about them, you are not alone, thouands of people have this problem, i wish you well and try not to worry to much as this will only escalate the problem
It is my Dad who suffers from severe anxiety and this in turn has led to a deep depression. At first the whole family thought that he was just lazy and because he too has a drink problem thought he was just selfish and we wanted nothing to do with him. It is only now as i have got older i am beginning to understand the disease that my Dad has and i am comming to terms with it and trying to understand that it is not his fault why he is the way he is. In my Dad’s case it is a genetic thing. His mother and three of his brothers also suffer from the disease. My Dad was signed into a mental health clinic for weeks just lately and i have now realised how mentally sick he really is and that he needs the support of his family to help him through this torture – thats what i call it – a torture in his mind. He is at a stage where he cannot be left on his own as he has such massive fears from his phone ringing to thuder storms. It is a very frustrating situation and you wish you could just give him a kick up the ass and tell him to cop on but now i understand that that will never happen and he actually cant do anything bout his situation -if my Dad was diagonised with cancer in the morning all the family would be giving him all the support in the world and getting the best treatment possible, well to me at last i can see that this depression/anxiety disease that my Dad has is the same as any other disease only maybe harder as it is very hard to fully understand unless you have information and suppoprt in relation to the disease. I write this message in the hope that anyone who has a family member or friend suffering from depression/anxiety to please try and understand and give them all the support you can as they need it so much because they are just lonely dependent people who need all the love they can get!
That’s another reason people don’t seek help that they need. Cancer is easier to diagnose and more believable and accepted. Torture is a great descriptive word for this crippling disease. I am glad you are giving your dad the support he needs. Good luck!
Hi, I find it is really hard to use computer in front of people. When I do need to do that, I feel extremely nervous. Because of this, I hate training at work and it really limited my career. Do you have any advice? Many thanks.
Hey Julie! Keep telling yourself you are in charge, you are the trainer, you can do this! If you find yourself getting too nervous, you can make a joke about the computer (I hate it when they keep moving the tab key or something along those lines) to get yourself back in check and keep going!
Hello,
I suffer daily with SA. I dont like eating in front of people, scared of doing something stupid, etc. Im wondering what little things i can do to help myself in this situation.
MR
I suffer from anxiety, when I am around people at school & when I am eatinga aswell,
And I also get extremly Nervous when I have to go to school, it makes me so ill, I don’t know what to do anymore. Some nights I just come in and cry for hours and hours
I wish I didn’t have this problem it is ruining my life. I have had concilling about a year ago.. but that did not change anything !!!
Reply back, Dreamer xx
Hi Miss Dreamer, Try to focus only on what you are doing at the moment. Try not to look ahead, nor behind. If it’s going to school, concentrate only on what is happening at the present time. In other words, don’t let your thoughts wander to what’s ahead or what you “think” might happen. Repeatedly tell yourself, I’m going to have a great day! Or, I’m going to ace that exam! Never let any negative thoughts interfere. Good Luck!
Hi Everyone, I suffer badly with SA, I feel it is destoying me it affects my everyday, at work, the shops, friends the little that I have. I never feel good enough and always wonder why people would like me because I am so boring, even as much as my family visiting i think ” why do they want to see me” “what am i going to say to them” how am I going to entertain them”? maybe it is a bit of depression now?? how do you escape this torture, i so badly would like to be someone else.
I feel that when i finally get the courage to go out i have to be a bit tipsy otherwise my mind goes completely blank and i cant think of anything to say anyway, i am just getting so tired of feeling this way. help
I have young children, who r themselves starting to become shy now thanks to me, i dont go shopping till im absolutley out of everything, kids miss birthday parties, xmas carnivals, even getting them to school is hard work they’re almost always late so i can avoid running into anyone.I have missed weddings, friends birthdays, n family events coz id rather aviod feeling uncomfortable, than catch up with ppl i havent seen 4 yrs…..My partner doesnt understand what im going through n tells me i should just listen when he tells me that going out 4 coffee with an old school friend would b good 4 me. i know what he is saying is correct it would b good 4 me to not miss out on that but he doesnt understand what i would b feeling 2 sit there n pretend im in a comfortable place, he even laughed at me when we caught a train into the city once n i got really hot n started crying feeling like i was running out of air…he doesnt realise it makes me feel even worse n even more that its all me n my fault, i dont know how to get myself to doctor to get help….
its so nice to know im not alone. I panic and have fear about the most stupid things. like talking on the phone at work, i am worried that i sound stupid to other people. also that everything i say is unnecessary and that people just ignore everything i say. I often think to myself why do i care what people think, but its beginning to take over my life
I was a bus driver for twenty – five years and had to give it up due to my illness. Here is a statement i gave to various job training places i had to attened
Statement – 8th February 2009
Although my CV might be mildly impressive, I am unable to do any of those things as I am suffering from mental health problems namely anxiety, depression and alcohol dependency for which I am having treatment from the Stonebow unit. I am on anti-depressants, attend alcohol counselling every three weeks, see a physcoligsht every three months and am on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist (12 mths).
Normal life is impossible for me. As a former individual who was confident and well liked, I do not like going out alone and rely on taxis to ferry me about and invoke a sense of fear and suspicion to people who do not know me.
Nobody walks away from a £1800 yr job with a good pension easily –a job I had been in for 25 yrs and relatively enjoyed doing. But I struggled for six or seven years until it was impossible to go on and felt suicidal. It is very likely that my PCV licence will be revoked.
I was claming ESA but had to have a medical with their doctor who said there was nothing wrong with me and was forced to claim Jobseekers allowance thereby making my situation more worrying. My GP strongly advised me to appeal which I did and am waiting to hear the outcome. Any appointment is met with anxiety and to be kept waiting an hour for a jobseekers interview in which I have to tell lies is not complimentary to the recovery of my illness.
I feel abused, have low esteem and think the future looks very bleak.
I have written this statement because I read that a person who did not put on her CV that she had depression was taken to court and sued for supplying false information and the recovery of her sick pay.
CBT is an amazing, quick, and lifelong tool. It is also EVIDENCE BASED – I can’t tell you how important that is. It actually WORKS! There are so many dodgy therapies out there, one has to be careful.
HI,i am suffering from social anxiety since 5 years.Whenever i am in crowed or in my class i become consciuos anout myself a lot.My breath become irreguler,i can’t sit confortably in crowed it become stressful and my head start aching.I force myself to think positive but bcoz of the symptoms i can’t think positive.I become tired and stressful with the imagination that people are watching me.Watching my face continously.I don’t have problem look wise means i am a good looking girl than also i have this problem.When i tell my problem to my parents or brother or sister they don’t understand me they say that you are ok.Nothing happened to me but how can believe this?I am suffering from it they don’t know that i am really going through a stressful daily.I don’t have confidence in me.
In my past i wasn’t good in studies at all in school but i am good in studies.I used to dance a lot and i was having lots of friends but now i have friends but i don’t mix up with them bcoz of my social phobia.When i talk with them than i find un little bit confortable but when i sit quietly i become unfortable that they will see my symtoms of fear,nervousness,my nose show my symtoms.Please please help me by your suggestions and advices.
Thank you
I’m a 33 year old male. What can I say, social anxiety has destroyed my life. I can’t work, and I have never had a girlfriend and never will. I wish I was dead.
hi my anxiety is being caused through a courtcase for custudy for my lovely son aidan but im all so not eating or sleeping crying all the time please reply and try and give me some advice lov donna
Hi Donna
I also suffer from Anxiety. Please go and speak to jour Doctor as soon as possible. It can be treated successfully. Dont suffer in silence, talke about it to everyone that will listen, and most of all dont hide it or feel ashemd of it.
wishing jou all the best Erika
Hi everyone, I accidentally came upon this page and read all of the comments….some said they wish they are dead, some say its torture….I KNOW how you guys feel..you guys got me crying and my heart goes out to everyone of you!!!!:((( I had this SAD since I was 18, people have been praying for me …( am almost bold with all the laying on of hands
) have used and bought just about every course on the net BUT still no cure…. but am still searching and positive..maybe its my life’s purpose but a cure/solution I WILL FIND and am looking forward helping others getting out of this HELL!!
Hello everyone. I’m also suffering from social anxiety and it has affected every part of my life. I have dropped out of 3 colleges so far because I didn’t feel like I belonged in there. I currently have no jobs and no friends and every relationship I’ve entered into has not worked out.
There’s always something on my mind as I feel like a thousand voices are inside my head. I can’t sort out my thoughts. This has also led me to isolate myself from my family to the extent that I don’t have contact with any family member now. Right now I think I’m on the edge as life has become really difficult. And I live in a third world country where much support is not available for people like me.
I wish I could get my hand on some form of medication but I can’t afford it and since I’m not working too because of my condition, I am also struggling to meet my basic needs. Sometimes I just want to move away from this country and start life all over again. I’ve been thinking about it a lot these days and I don’t seem to find any solution to it.
I AM SUFFERING FROM SA, TO THE POINT I JUST WANT TO BE BYSELF ESPECIALLY WHEN I AM EATING. PLEASE HELP.
I had social anxiety for years, yes it can really make you suffer. The thing to do is to stay open minded and keep trying different things until you find what works for you. For me it was going to telephone support groups for social anxiety and working the Social Anxiety Anonymous program of recovery, there is a free book for that: http://healsocialanxiety.com/SPAOnlineLibrary.html
Hi
Over the past few months I have started to have a problem with social anxiety at work. This worries me because i never used to be like this. I start getting paranoid, high anxiety of what people may think of me when i do or say something to them or in a group and also have been losing sleep because i am filled with worry. I feel stupid every time i get done having a conversation with someone at work. I even limit myself from going out in public only to get what i need and return home. I don’t attend social events like i used to and this kills me. I for some reason feel much better when i am by myself. These things get to me emotionally and i don’t know what to do.
Hey Kraig, the best thing for you to do is to not limit yourself. Avoiding will only make things worse. If you need a little help with the anxiety, don’t rule out medication. I couldn’t sleep because of my anxiety and my sister in law actually made an appointment and went with me to the doctor. She prescribed an anxiety medicine, and although I’m no longer on it, it helped a lot in the sleeping department. I have some suggestions on the blog that might help. From muscle relaxation to stopping your negative thoughts. I hope you will find helpful ways to turn your situation around.
Answered yes to all of those question. I don’t know how I managed to finish college, I would blush whenever someone tried to talk to me.
I have only had two proper jobs at 28 years old, one was for one month and the other for one week. I find it so hard to speak to people and start a conversation, people must think I’m a freak and will avoid me whenever possible.
I can’t concentrate and end up ignoring people where I think I will say something stupid to them or what they must think of me. I try to avoid using the phone whenever possible and dread going to public places like the movies or a restaurant.
That’s a big part of the problem. People who don’t have Social Anxiety don’t take it seriously. I’ve run into professionals who were “suppose to help” not take it seriously. We’ve come a long way in getting this noticed and taken seriously, but I feel we have a ways to go yet.
Hi,
I have been suffering from anziety for past two years. I fear being alone, travelling in lift, airplanes, driving alone…I have read about anxiety and got to know about CBT. I want to know how helpful is it? what other options are there to overcome this problem…
Life is beautiful and I wont let this anxiety making it a hell…its tough at times.. a small work becomes a task…at times u hv to push urself…
I feel due to this problem I m unable to grow professionally….and its affects me a lot…kindly tell me more about CBT and any other therapy for the same..
Divya
Hello. I am not sure what I have. I think I suffer from Anxiety. I try to ignore it. But it does not go away. I am trying desperately to get work, it is hard. The government says we have to work and I am all up for that. I come from a hard working family background. I don’t know how I have become so ill. I feel really judged when I am around people. I sometimes make excuses not to attend certain things. But on occasions I can attend things. I go for lots of interviews to get jobs but I always fail in my interview, this is due to my anxiety. I don’t tell anyone I have anxiety. I really want to work, maybe if I got work my problem would go away. I don’t want to be on benefits. I just want a life.
Juliet and Andrea have put my exact feelings into the right words. I feel worthless sometimes and I cant do any of the things all the cool people do. I am tired of feeling isolated and scared to leave the house I avoid the neighbors, my friends, family, people at the store who try and talk to me I just get nervous I feel like I am being fake when I do try and make small talk and I over-anayize every social situation. I try to stay cool and focus on what they are saying sometimes my mind wonders somewhere else or I am just so nervous and scared of looking stupid. Its hard to make friends I try to make friends at work but I am scared to look stupid infront of a whole crowd of people its like my brain jus froze up and I dont kno what to say to break the ice and I avoid going anywhere that people invite me ive made so many excuses not to go that everyone stopped asking now I feel so left out. I lost my job and i only have 1 friend left but even she is getting frustrated with me always avoiding going places with her. I would like to go but since I never get out much I dont know how to act normal and what to say. I dont have medical coverage so i cant even think about getting help this is my life and I just gotta get over it or deal with it.
I suffered domestic abuse from an ex partner of 4 years. I had a tough time.I was fine until he got out of prison and i am a nervous wreck, have no confidence unless its one of my close friends or family.
I cant get a job because imso nervous and have panic attacks.
What can help
I have a boy of 1 and feel like im ruining his life already and am a crap mum
Hello gaga, can you get help from the authorities to make sure your ex cannot contact you? Are you on medication for your panic attacks? You are not a crap mum, you are just going through some terrible times right now.
hi! i suffer bad from SA, im only my real true self in front of my boyfriend….funny and goofy but when around other people i get really nervous, so nervous that my voice shakes and mind goes blank….i hate when my voice shakes! when a situation is all over im constantly kicking myself in the butt for acting stupid. Please anybody! give me some advice
i dont really feel i know who i am anymore. i am so stressed about everything. i hate talking on the phone in public, i hate large groups where i am expected to speak or say something and i go blank, i worry about doing small things with others around. i dont like driving with others in my car, i feel as though i might miss a turn and feel dumb, i dont know. i cannot seem to get a grip on life, my fiance is so outgoing, and he has definitely helped, but i still have tremendous stress. i always get nervous and shaking around his friends. sometimes i am more relaxed if alcohol is involved. i wish i could actually talk to someone about this.
My friend is suffering from what we think is SAD, whenever he’s in a social situation he starts to sweat.he thinks it is ”hydrosis” because the sweating is so excessive that he gets so embarrassed that he has to leave. It is starting to disable him and he mentioned he didn’t even want to go to the shops for groceries. We used to live together as a couple and I thought he was lazy and drinking too much and we used to argue about him not making th efort to meet my friends for dinner, drinks, parties, but now we’ve split up I realise that it wasn’t his fault. He actually couldn’t physically face these social situations and so he would stay in drinking watching films and playing the guitar. I am really worried that I don’t know what to suggest to him and he hasn’t seen his family and friends from home in 9 months. I feel responsible as we moved to a new town far from home tpgether and I want to help. I heard about botox injections and other medications. Any advice would be appreciated
“Do you worry for days, weeks, months about an event you have to attend? ” sums it up for me.
Social Anxiety has destroyed my life. Even if there is any cure.. I dont think it matters any more. The best part of my life has already been consumed in being afraid and worrying about how to avoid situations I feel uncomfortable with.
I have already ruined my career.. I could never have one with SAD. I tried setting up a Software Development firm with a business partner but having avoided all key meetings I wonder if this will continue for long. My partner doesnt know of my handicap and I dont have the courage to discuss it with him.
My only reason for living is to be able to provide for my children.. but if I fail in doing that it will destroy me completely.
Hi there, i myself have been going through Stress to the point i cannot think straight. earlier in the year i moved into my own place, had soo much College work and had a Big project on at work, i wont go too much into the situation which kicked it off. but i became and still OCD, each and everyday im scared so much to the point where im not sure what to do, ive been to the GP which he recommended a book which has helped to a point. but i still wish that i could live the life i lived before this event, i had been having full blown panic attacks. i wish i could “Get back to normal” a few weeks ago i turned 27 even on my birthday all i could think about was the obvious the only thing i wanted was to be better i didnt want no presents just my life back .
Volunteering has helped me immensely and my doctor has agreed. I currently volunteer as an IT support person for disabled people and I actually am starting to enjoy it more and and more.
I started to volunteer for just half a day during June, but these last week weeks I have been volunteering for two days a week instead and find it helping me grow.
Although I still cannot summon myself to go into the dining room with a lot of other people or outside the IT room with people I can speak with most people 1-to-1 in a room.
I have been dealing with SA for a while and alot of people in my life don’t understand it they think it is just a reason for me not to work. It all started when my father passed away when i was 10 yrs. old and i am 29 now i’ve had jobs in the past and have done ok with them other then at times depending on the situation like waiting on someone i don’t like or someone i’ve not seen in a while or if a big crowd of people come in at times my SA is worse then others i was laid off work 2 yrs. ago and it seems to have gotten worse…I don’t want to go anywhere by myself because i feel it takes the focus off of me if someone else is with me and i have sit in the parking lot of conv.stores until nobody else is in the store then i’ll go in and i’ve even sit and waited for a while and just decided to go ahead and go back home and just try to go back later..like i said sometimes are worse then others but i’ve been dealing with this for a long time and it has kept me from doing so much in life and i am afraid my 10 yr. old my pick this up and be the same way and i pray that she doesn’t because it sucks living life this way
Hi, I’ve read your comments, same boat , had it ALL my life, school, I stayed back four times,because I would not talk, even through high school, went to summer school a lot,could not hold a relationship, lost my marriage, lost my kids, and always lost my job after a few yrs, i have it so bad!!, I,m 45 an I thought I would grow out of it , still have it. And my daughter has it pretty bad to, i saw it when she would not let any one hold her, and when they did, she would scream at the top of her lungs,she’s no going to make it. Even though her teachers are trying to help, meds are the best even though every one disagree with it, work with your doctors, I took them for awhile, but ran out of funds, I saw a different ,but for me I will work on it,as for my daughter still trying to convince the rest that she may need them for a while, I can tell you she is now 13 and will not talk, she’ll talk at home ,even voice her opinion , life is double hard with this genetic defect,and for women with PMS this a triple whammy,there is treatment, let your doctor know about it, they will try to help ,that’s the first step, good luck, I hope this works for you, and for me too.
Ever since I was a lil girl I being dealing with this is just so difficult to get along with other people because is too much the worrying of what would they think..I’m 22 I have no friends just had one relationship that did not work out and from there on not dated anybody else because I think that what I have to say. Is not important to anybod. Always keep my feelings to myself because I have no way of expressing it.everytime I say something I think I sound stupid and fake so I just try to listen to what others have to say and just make silly faces tha’s what I been told but I don’t even notice because I’m too nervous. Nobody knows I suffer from thi I even feel scared to let my doctor know..my family would never understand the pain I go through everyday.because to me it feels that I’m just here absent but here.
Anxiety is just in your head, you aren’t weird or crazy as most of the time in has made me feel, there is help out there to deal with this, Remember that anxiety is a feeling that comes over you and it can’t hurt you, when anxiety comes over to you, talk to it inside your’re head, “Oh its you again bring it on you can’t hurt me wow heaps scarey” stuff like this really helps, check out a site called panic away, this really helped me and it works, i have suffered from this for 7yrs now, but i’ll keep on keeping on, don’t fight it, learn how to control it, and ,make it an allie.
Iv only just realised over the past few weeks that theres something wrong but didnt know what it was. But i thought about my problems… I find it really hard to do things like in public such as go shoppin or something simple like pop to ther corner shop for milk. I hate leaving the house I hate being in public on my own cos i think that everyone is staring at me and making comments about me and making me feel really uncomfortable. Im a 20 year old single mother and i shouldnt be feeling like this its really scaring me and i dont know what to do. I need help but i dont know what to say or do. Im stuck
I managed to recover from social anxiety!!!!!^_^
Hi,
I have suffered from social anxiety my whole entire life. When I was younger people in school would ask “Why is she so shy”, but know I have found out that it was not shyness but instead social anxiety that was keeping me from interacting with others. All throughout high school and college I always tried avoided social situations and also tried to avoid speaking in public. But whenever I had to do class presentations in front of the class, my heart would beat fast, my hands would get sweaty, I would feel very light headed, and my voice would quiver. Now as a 23 year old , I feel very lonely because I don’t have any close reliable friends to talk to, I have never been in a relationship, and i tend to distance myself from my family because I feel like I embarrass them. It has really affected my school work because I cannot focus and I am unable to participate in class discussions due to this social anxiety. This problem basically has ruined my whole life and I do not know what to do or who to talk to. I feel so alone and I am so afraid of my future. It seems like everybody is progressing forward in their lives and I am stuck in reverse because of this problem. I have no job, I am stuck at home with my family, I do not know what to do with my life and sometimes I feel so depressed that I think about suicide. I have never taken any medications for this problem because I am afraid of the side effects but still I need help to get my life together.
Thank you for stopping by, Dee. Know that you are not alone, as you can see by the other comments. We all know the loneliness of this disease and how depressing it can be. Embarrassment is a huge issue. We feel that no one can possibly understand what we go through every single day. But we do here. Sometimes we just need a little help, so don’t be afraid to research medications. I’m not advising you that you should get on medication, but it’s something you might consider. The black hole that we’ve all been in can be not only miserable, but scary. I give you huge credit for posting here, it must have been difficult. But I’m so glad you did. If you would like to talk further, let me know. Just know you are not alone! {{{HUGS}}}, Pam
hi, i think i have some sort of anxiety problems, i dnt go out on my own i cnt tlk on the phone i cnt meet new people, i even find it hard to tlk to people i know, i always think people are going to judge me and i just feel stupid so i avoid arkward situations. i am always on edge around people, thinking what they are thinking about me, its really holding me back i dont work because i am 2 nervous to meet new people, i just dont no what to do, if i went to the doctors and told them what would they do to help?
Hey Sarah! The doctors will do an assessment first. You answer questions basically. This is where you have to be honest. Tell them what you can and can’t do and also how you are feeling. Do you feel lightheaded in certain situations, do you get the shakes, or have severe stomachaches? Your doctor may suggest counseling. If you feel like you can’t do that, tell him/her. They need to know how severe your case is or isn’t. They may prescribe medicine to take the edge off your symptoms. Everyone and every doctor is different, but this has been my personal experience. Good luck and thanks for posting!!!
im freaking out. i dont want to go to work today because its not busy enough and you have to be a sale person and there is alot of people that come to the outlets. i had a panic attak on saturday and had to eave work and now im embarrassed and dont want to go back. help ! ugh
I might be suffering from SA. though I feel as it could be something else. I’ve talked to school conslers, and other adults. Its almost as I don’t have a nerve to do much about it. I read stuff like this and it seems mentally and physically impossible! I’ve tried a lot of things. Some told me to meditate which just makes me think harder of things that stress me out. I’m a 14 year old girl. Ive been diagnosed with severe anemia. What it feels to Brit normal is beyond my reach. I worry because I’m always so slow and tired that people think I’m stupid. So I don’t try to make friends and watch everyone on the sidelines. Im scared to start conversations. I feel to depressed to do anything. Any tips that I might be able to sink into my brain?
hi….i am a 20 year old college grad student, suffering from social anxiety. It is difficult for me to even write this here because im scared of what will all of you think of me. i dont know how long i have been suffering from SA, but it has been a few years. I am really tired of it. Criticising and evaluating every move made by me n what did the person in front think about it.Not able t interact very effeciently in a large group. Even the thought of being the centre of attention of a large number of peaople scares me.i guess come across as aloof, disintrested and unfriendly to some people.Is there anything I can do to help myself without needing to go for therapy?
social phobia is so sickening,i think i am with this conddition for 4 years,it all started when i was startn high school,i use to be a confident kind,grew up in church so most of the time i would speak in front of great congregation with great confidence,i was talkative and had alot of friends,wwhen i was in primary,most girls would ask me out and i use to be the sweetest guy and all dat…but the point is i was assertive and much confident then till an incident,i use to make jokes everyday in school and home and elsewhere, one mornig in class i made a joke which did not sound so funny but i laughed about it while nobody even smirted,that incident kept on getting on me through time,as time passed my abilit to talk started to fade away,i started to isolate myself from my friends and people in church,funny thing is people usually admire me when i just walk past them,they think i am just pretending to be shy even to this day because most people know how i was earlier,i can make friends easiliy and think of great things to say but the two things that are getting on my nurves are public speaking and dateing … six different girls asked to go out with me but i can not beause of this phobia.. alot of time people told me damn straight that i am cute….mostly girls .i also suffer avoidant personalit disoder because i avoid thesse stressors and the interesting thing is that before any social contact i would be so nervous before the contact but through the contact i would do just fine .all this led me to think that maybe we are just making all this up in our mind,nobody can be cured from social phobia completely because fear is inbuilt,we were born with it so lets say this social phobia thing is not a problem itself,we are making it a problem so i say lets just give up!!!!!forget it,make ourself stupid infront of everybody,accept emberassment and defeat and see wha happens,if things get worse just say it was a coincidence,just show our fears the way to go and not try to discard it,,,and remember that GOD says the last word,the way i see it,i think God is trying to get me back on track as i was earlier from my off track routin,we will get better, all of us….just say it
Yes, I have social anxiety. It has caused me to miss out on a lot of fun and exciting aspects of being young, but I’m resolved now to overcome it and help others in similar struggles. I think the key is to resolve to take action. Once you get moving and take steps to fight SA every day, nothing can stop you.
I struggled with social anxiety myself, but have been able to fully recover from this condition. I discovered that people who struggle with social anxiety are usually performance-oriented people. This simply means that they put so much pressure on themselves to be perfect in social situations. This need to perform and be perfect creates tension in the mind leading to anxiety and its related symptoms. My advice is that when you enter social situations, focus more on learning and growth and allow life to happen on its terms.
Good day. Just wanted to write a brief statement and indicate to you you that I 100 % concur with your specific post. Surely spot on.
I am 13 very young to be nervous all the time but i get soo nervous before i go to school i feel so sick and sometimes get so upset that i throw up and i get even more vervousl before i see my boyfriend i am so scared to be judged by people i am a christian and i have prayed everyday that God would help me and that my stomach would stop hurting all the time but it just keeps hurting and i dont knoww at all what to do plz help thx
Hey, Abby, thanks for your comment. I know that took courage. Have you or can you talk to your parents about it? Would they be willing to read a little of this blog to understand what you are going through? Is there a friend you can confide in? Can you talk to your boyfriend, or perhaps a counselor at school? I remember days like you mention. Sometimes it’s easier to cope if there are “safe” people in our lives. People you feel comfortable around, even if it’s just one.
You need to get rid of your negative thoughts; the thoughts in your head that people are judging you. This is probably the hardest to do, but very important. If someone happens to look at you at school, don’t assume they’re judging you, for instance. Most of the time we create this inner turmoil from nothing more than someone looking at us, or thinking “what if”. What if they’re judging me, what if I trip in class, what if I look stupid. All these thoughts racing through our heads will keep us from moving forward.
The first thing I would recommend is to concentrate on stopping those negative thoughts. I’ve written a post on negative thoughts for ideas. You have to become very aware of when your thoughts are racing and are negative, in order to turn them around or to stop them completely. It takes work, but it’s worth it. Best of luck and you can do this!!!
Hi everyone.
I agree completely with admin. First of you to control your negative thoughts, becaucse all problems come from your mind. You are a victim of your mind! To overcome your anxiety, you have to learn effective techniques.Believe me, If you learn how to cnotrol your thoughts by using some of powerful techniques, your life will never be the same!
http://anewlife-now.blogspot.com/2012/01/powerful-tips-to-end-your-worry-anxiety.html
hi there ive just found out recently that i suffer from sa from a doctor,its ruining life ive no close friends as i withdraw from them all,find it hard visiting people so avoid it.people think in odd because of this its just when i try to have a conversation with them i suffer tunnel visit start sweating,dont know if thjis is normal but it makes me just wanna leave.i feel so lonely i cant even keep relationships im married at the min but feel the need to escape again its so annoying.the doc is puttin me on a cbt course so i hope it helps as i need to change my life.
I have suffered from severe anxiety all my life and there have been many times when this disorder has turned my world upside down.
My family see it as selfishness, they have no concept of the huge amount of effort it takes to try and overcome the creeping anxiety/shyness while I am falling apart to the point where I cannot even speak, this can present itself as cold indifference. I feel wretched to the point of hopelessness. I feel I might have put a dampener on my Son’s Wedding, I put in a mammoth effort to engage in conversation and to be as involved as I could, the end result was me looking fairly normal to begin with..only to find myself shutting down bit by bit until I had nothing to offer, I couldn’t even tell my Son how proud I am of him or how much I love him…I could only hug him a lot, not much to offer when I only get to see him once every two years or so (he lives half a world away) I know this has been something he has had to deal with his whole life but I thought I could have done better for him on the day.
hi everyone i think you all who have SA just took a HUGE step on writing this… and we are all brave enough and we can deal with this.. i also suffer from this and it is really bad bc i too felt i wanted to be somebody else i didnt want to be me bc i suck at speaking my mind goes blank when im listening to others and my heart breaks bc i dont want to be like that… i want to be able to speak and have friends like i used too and dont feel stupid but one day well all be our truly self <3
ANYONE and i really mean ANYONE that wants to talk to someone i am here for you remember i said i suffer from this and i am just like you… i want to be your friend and maybe we’ll feel really weird at first but then it’ll get better i speak and type in english and spanish :b my email is holdingthesun@hotmail.com you can search me on Facebook bc i really dont check my email but really talk to me i want to be your friend and remember i am just like you.. and i would like to speak about this who also has it and understands how i feel..
I had been suffering from social anxiety for sometime. But what I discovered as a sufferer is that doctors can help you as well as osychologist and other medical practitioners. But you as person has a higher chance of handling it better than anyone else. Getting over an anxiety disorder is all about doing what you fear, you may be a nervous wreck as you do whatever it is that makes you get the nerves, but it’s much better than sitting down & avoiding this scary situations : Like making phone calls, going to the mall, doing presentations e.tc. The more you avoid them the higher your anxiety levels build up. But as long as you go out there and actually try even though you may fail, you are guaranteed some change, like you will be less scared of the situation the next time you try it, if you are consistent and keep practicing your anxiety will slowly fade away. I would recommend anyone who suffers from SAD to face their fears. Don’t let the fears boss you around. You the boss of you. !!
Easier said than done. But take the first step. Good luck to all <3.
I like your useful writing. super contribution. I hope you release others. I will continue watching
Hello my brothers and sisters of SAD! This has literally rocked my life and not in the good way you are always hoping for. I was a very very social person all my life but then my family died, all within a year and a half and since then, I avoid going out with what friends I have left. I have terrible panic attacks when I have an appointment or plans to go somewhere. I try to find ways to not go! This is not the way I want to live my life at all and I know my family wants me to fill my life with joy but I was laid off from my job that I actually started to get a handle on this illness and I was so proud of myself. Then once I was laid off, I went right back to my anxious self. I feel so overwhelmed and I am completely broke with no way to get any help at all. I get very sad but have never wanted to harm myself so I thank the good Lord above for that and also I don’t drink nor take drugs. I have some good things in my life so I don’t want to exist this way anymore, I want to live, really live and feel happy again. Good luck to all of you and I hope you will stay in touch. Honestly, just having you all here being honest and brave, really has inspired me to get over this and FIGHT it. Thank you to the Admin for this wonderful outlet. Take care and God bless each and every one of you!
Sincerely,
Susan~
I am so sorry for your loss, Susan. A huge event in our lives is oftentimes the cause of SAD. Not always, but it’s very hard to pick back up after tragedy. I’m so glad you stopped by.
Thank you so very much Pam, I feel better as I said just being able to talk here with all of you knowing I am not alone in dealing with this crippling illness. I will beat it! I am here if you would like to talk anytime. I mean that. Take care and God bless you! Hugsss
And that’s the reason why I started this blog, so people know they are not alone. It can feel so isolated, and you can’t imagine others feel what you’re feeling.
Let us know your journey! I would love to hear your success story!
You got it girl! I am gonna kick SAD’s tail!
Awesome!!! Would love to see that, cause it will help everyone here!!!